Deep Down
by pansy1980
Summary: Chakotay is on his deathbed. He is surrounded by his friends, who all prepare to say goodbye. A brand new story from Pansy! Feedback in any language is great! Chapter 3 is new!
1. Chapter 1

Deep Down

Chakotay is on his deathbed. He is surrounded by his friends, who all prepare to say goodbye.

Everyone was there except for Tuvok. Tuvok had died several years earlier. B'Elanna and Tom were there with their two children, Miral and TJ. B'Elanna also had one more on the way, another girl. Harry who was now a captain of his own vessel, stood next to them. On the opposite side of the room were Seven and her aunt.

They all shared a few laughs and tears with Chakotay. And then the door to his room opened, and everyone turned. In came Admiral Janeway. She gave them all a small smile and headed toward Chakotay's side.

B'Elanna watched her former captain. She always thought that the two of them would have gotten married once they returned to Earth, but it never happened. They stayed close friends, and now their friendship was going to end.

Chakotay looked up at the women he had called his closest friend for years. He looked around the room and smiled at everyone. "Could you give me a moment alone with my former captain, if it's not to much trouble?"

Everyone nodded and proceeded to leave. When they had all gone, Chakotay took Kathryn's hand.

"I want to thank you Kathryn Janeway for being my friend for so many years. There were times that we fought, times that we cried, and times that we wanted to rip each other heads off. But mostly their were smiles and good times.

Kathryn began to cry, but he tightened his grip and her hand. "No tears Kathryn, only happy memories between us at this time in our lives."

Kathryn nodded, and wiped a tear away from her face. "Do you remember the time that alien boarded Voyager, and claimed to have been on Voyager but we had never met her before. And apparently her species were forgettable by any species that encountered it. I never told you this before, but I was jealous of her for years."

Chakotay looked confused. But then he remembered. "I remember her, but only small parts. But why would you be jealous of her Kathryn?"

"Because if you don't remember something, or someone, you don't have to face reality without them near you."

Chakotay stayed quiet for a moment. He realized what she was saying, and the memories of loosing his best friend came to his mind.

"I brought you a little present Chakotay. She picked up the bag that she had brought in and recovered the present. The present wasn't wrapped. He turned it over and had to laugh.

"You brought me a picture of Tuvok? I wasn't expecting that."

Kathryn put the picture on his table. "I brought it for two reasons Chaktoay. The first reason was I thought that you could get to say goodbye. The second reason that I brought it was so that Tuvok could be here."

"Thank you Kathryn."

"Chaktoay I.." The tears began to work their way back up to the surface, and Chakotay could sense her trying to hold them back.

"Kathryn could you come a little closer please?" Kathryn moved her chair closer to him. While she was still standing he began to speak. "You know Kathryn for years I always thought that Tuvok was spying on us. I used to think that he had bugged Voyager. Because every time I came close to kissing you, he would interrupt. But since he is no longer with us I guess I can do it safely now."

At that moment he found the strength to sit up in bed and pull her close. He kissed her softly. Kathryn struggled to keep her composure as her tears began to devour her. The kiss became deeper, as she sat on the bed next to him. Tears began falling from Chakotay's eyes.

And then Tuvok's picture fell over and crashed to the floor. They were both startled by it. But they both began to laugh. Chakotay took her hand one more time. "I have wanted to do that for years Kathryn, thank you."

Chakotay closed his eyes. "I'm very tired all of a sudden, I need to rest my eyes. Stay with me Kathryn.

Kathryn kissed his hand which was still attached to hers. "Good bye Chakotay, she whispered.

Chakotay awoke to trees all around him. He was walking through a large forest. From behind a tree he saw a shadow.

"Hello?"

The shadow turned.

"Do you remember me?"

"I'm sorry, I don't. Who are you?"

"Many years ago, you found me and my people. Your people called us the Sky Spirits."

Chakotay remembered.

The man smiled. "I am here because your journey has not ended with happiness. Your heart carries much sorrow. You must fix this before you can enter the sacred place of your family."

"I don't understand."

"You will."

Chakotay saw a bright green light, that became more luminous with every second. He closed his eyes.

He heard his name.

"Mr Chakotay the helm."

His eyes opened. He was on Voyager.

Kathryn stood in front of him. "Commander are you feeling OK?"

"I'm fine captain, sorry, I was just overcome with emotion."

Kathryn smiled at him. "I'm with your there Chaktoay. After 7 years we are finally home."

TBC


	2. It's not a pyramid, its a triangle

Deep Down

pt2

**It's not a pyramid, its a triangle.**

Star fleet escorted Voyager to one of the docking stations above Earth. Apparently they thought Voyager could get lost on the way. The ship glided down to the clamps and then stopped.

Chakotay turned just as Captain Janeway began to speak.

"Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain speaking.

After 7 years we are finally home. I will be in touch with Star fleet momentary. If you are currently on duty your are dismissed to your quarters at this time. I expect to see you all at the party this evening even though I am not sure when it will be I am sure that someone will eventually tell me.

Kathryn begins to laugh, and then she looks at me.

I was just about to say something to her when Seven bounded down the stairs, and took a seat on my lap. I had never noticed it before, but Kathryn's eyes shed a tear.

"Nice work commander, I'm glad that you can land a spacecraft without crashing it. You have the bridge I will be in my ready room."

I wanted to say something to her but Seven waiving goodbye to the captain and she ran her fingers through my hair didn't seem like the appropriate time. Deep down inside myself, I kicked myself for letting this whole situation with Seven get so out of hand. I never wanted Seven, and to be perfectly frank, this "new" clingy Seven was more than I could stand.

"Seven I think we need to talk, privately. Can you meet me in my quarters in ten minutes?"

Seven nodded and proceeded to put her head on my chest. "I shall miss you." She popped off of me and headed toward the turbo-lift. I slowly turned around in my chair, and became aware of Harry's tongue that had fallen onto his station.

"Mr Kim you have the bridge until I get back."

Harry shook his head. "Thank you Commander."

I entered the turbo lift, and as the doors shut I recalled how many times I had been on the device.

As the door opened I started down the long hallway toward my quarters. I stood in front of my quarters for a little while before I went in. I really didn't know what I was going to say to Seven. In fact, in all the years that I had dated any women, they had always broken it off with me.

The door slid open.

Seven was seated on the couch waiting for me. I sat next to her and I sighed.

"Seven, I think that I have made a mistake. You see, when you asked to form a relationship together, I was rather flattered by the idea. I enjoyed being with you, and showing you new and in your words irrelevant things. But the truth, Seven is that compared to you, I'm an old man."

"Age is irrelevant."

"Seven, you deserve a fresh start with someone who is going through the same things that you are going through."

"I am confused, are there other Borg's that have become human on Earth?"

"No, I am quite sure that there are none."

Seven shook her head, looked at the table then back at me. "Commander I am confused, if there are no people like me on Earth, how can they be in my situation?"

I don't know what happened next. Perhaps I was just overwhelmed by the whole new situation that I found myself in. I certainly didn't want to hurt Seven, that had never been my intention. But what came out of my mouth next surprised even me.

"Seven, I love Kathryn."

Seven's eyes got wide. "So you wish to terminate our current relationship?"

"Yes, I'm sorry but I never wanted to hurt you."

"Pain is irrelevant. Consider our relationship terminated." Then she got up and walked out the door. I remained seated on the couch, still trying to figure out if I had dumped her or if she had dumped me. For the sake of my ego, I decided to go with the later.

I sighed and took a deep breath, and hit my com badge.

"Chakotay to Janeway."

"What can I do for you commander?"

"Is it possible that I could speak to you privately in a few minutes?"

There was a long pause. And I simply waited for her to answer.

I was just about to hit my Combadge again when I saw a blue transporter light behind me. I turned and there in front of me was Captain Janeway.

"So what is it commander?"

I looked at the floor, I was unable to look at her. I was ashamed to admit it but I needed those few minutes to figure out what exactly I was going to tell her. I wanted to tell her everything and make her understand the situation. But for once I was unsure about my next move.

" I just wanted to say congratulations for getting your crew home safely."

"Thank you commander. Was that everything?"

"Yes."

It was her turn to shake her head. "Are you sure?"

"Postive."

"In that case I will see you later, maybe at the party this evening?" I nodded just as she transporter back to the ready room.

A few seconds later, I finally got my head in the game, and realized what I had said to her. Feverishly I bounded down the hall and to the turbo-lift.

"Bridge!" I shouted at the controls. In all of my life I had never witnessed such a slow transport. Finally the door slid open. I ran down the stairs, and stood in front of her door. I took a deep breath and rang the chime.

"Come."

I took one more deep breath and stepped inside.

Kathryn was at her desk drinking a cup of coffee. "Commander what can I do for you?"

I took off my Maqui pips, and slid them across the table.

In the deepest voice I could muster I spoke. "Thats captain to you, captain."

She looked up at me.

I gave her a smile, and she returned it. "Yes, I guess you are right, captain."

I could hear her breath get caught in her throat.

I slowly walked around the desk toward her.

"Kathryn, I want to go to this party tonight with you."

TBC


	3. CaptainVSCaptain

Deep Down

Pt3

Captain-VS-Captain

He had practically growled the last statement. Even Kathryn had to admit that she hadn't seen this side of him since he had first transported to Voyager. A part of her memory sidestepped to that moment in time, but then quickly returned. He was standing next to her now.

"Captain, permission to speak freely."

Kathryn shook her head. "Permission granted."

He looked Kathryn dead in the eyes. "I have been in love with you for seven years. And until this moment in time I have not made my feelings known to you. I love you Kathryn, and that's all you need to know. Permission to leave, maim." He had added the maim because he knew how much Kathryn hated it. In fact, he knew that she would get angry about it.

Kathryn was about to respond to his statement when he had added one of the worst words in the English language. She stood and put herself right in front of him.

"Sit down captain."

Chaktoay remained standing. "You can no longer give me orders captain, we are the same rank."

"Like hell I can't. This is my ship Chakotay, and if there is one rule that you know better than the rest is that you never call me maim. How on Earth could you do something like that? I mean seriously how did you manage after all these years to forget that rule?"

"Shut up Kathryn."

She went ballistic. She pushed him with her hands, but only moved him about a foot. "Did you just tell me to shut up Chaktoay?"

"I did. Because I think you are missing the point."

"And what point could that be captain? The fact that you told me to shut up or the fact that you called me maim?"

"Neither."

"You are dismissed captain."

Chakotay's eyes grew wide. "Thats the one Kathryn."

And then it hit Kathryn. It was so obvious. How could she have missed it. But he was with Seven, she had seen both of them together. The admiral had told her that the two of them had ended up together. Deep down Kathryn had been hurt. She had always wanted them to be together, but her job her responsibility as captain had always been front and center. How could she had missed such a blatant clue?"

"Trying to process everything Kathryn? Let me give you something else to process."

And then he grabbed her and kissed her.

Then as if nothing had happened, he removed his lips from hers.

"I will see you tonight, Kathryn."

And then he left.

For a whole five minutes Kathryn thought about running after him. But she had decided against it, after all Starship captain's don't run after people. That was what transporters were for.

Kathryn tried to concentrate on her work. But for once, she couldn't. For once the only thing that she wanted to do was be close to him. And then she remembered the party.

"Computer time."

"0400."

For the second time in her life, Kathryn squealed. She went over to the replicator, and thought for a few minutes quietly.

In his quarters, Chakotay was trying to get his tie on straight. He had wanted to surprise Kathryn and show up out of uniform. After all tonight when they they transported to Earth, for the party, he had a surprise for her.

He checked his image in the mirror one last time. He looked around his quarters one last time and proceeded to leave. He turned just as he got to the front door, and picked something off the table and slid it into his side pocket.

The door opened.

Kathryn's quarters were right next door. But somehow he had managed to make it seem longer. He shuffled along slowly. The ship was quiet, almost everyone was already at the party. Finally he reached the door, and rang the chime.

The door opened, he almost forgot about the party.

She turned and smiled in front of him.

And that did him in.

"Kathryn you look lovely."

Kathryn gave him a crooked smile. "You look very handsome."

"Shall we go to the party Kathryn?"

She took his hand, "Led the way captain."

Chakotay chuckled as they made their way to the transporter.


End file.
